Sacred – John Doe

You defiled my sacred temple by breaking in without an invitation. Not deterred by the word “no”, you forced yourself inside of me. You tainted my lips with yours, you contaminated my flesh with your bare hands and left me impure, in pain, crying from the inside out by the thrusting of your sword. Unbroken by my screams, unyielding by my tears, you left my heart covered in muddy footprints. In time, I hope my tears will wash away the blackened stains that you have left etched onto me, the way I washed the physical evidence of your assault and excitement off of me that night. I scrubbed, I cried, I let the hot water burn you off of my flesh until I was raw and red.

You fail to recognize what you stole when you were done tarnishing my body, befouling my mind. The things you took from my sacred temple on your way out that you had not entered with were overwhelmingly vast. You took a part of me. You stole my sense of security, my honor, my purity, my confidence and you brought in fear and guilt to corrupt my stable thoughts and infect them with your penetrating cruelty.

Overpowering me, your eyes ingrained themselves into my mind. Now, they are the only things I see when I close my eyes to sleep at night. Your grunts and moans and sounds of pleasure at my expense implanted themselves into my mind and now in silence that is all that I hear. The sense of your touch refuses to depart no matter how many times I wash you off. I feel you in everything I touch. I see you everywhere I go, I hear your voice in all that surrounds me. Worst of all, not even the comfort of those I love is enough to drown out the trauma you have branded me with. The sacred temple of my body, once mine, no longer feels like a safe haven or even like a sacred space but a reminder of my vulnerability and fragility. Once sacred, my body now lay desecrated and the lasting impact through time has been ethereal.

5 thoughts on “Sacred – John Doe

    1. Thank you Birgitta! And yes going through any type of assault can be very traumatic and painful for not only the person but their loved ones. As an advocate for domestic violence and a rape crisis counselor I feel very strongly about the subject and am happy I was able to convey a strong message through my text. Thank you for reading and commenting!

      Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Rajni, you have no idea how much your words mean to me. I am flattered. Thank you for commenting and sharing your thoughts 🙂 I think addressing topics such as these are extremely important and while sometimes I am weary to post about such intense, touchy subjects I think it is important to express myself and get the message out there! I am glad that you were able to feel the message because when I write, that is what I try to aim for.

      Liked by 1 person

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